Sunday, December 22, 2013


Today is the first full day of Winter --- all evidence to the contrary. Well, at least there's no evidence of Winter's arrival here in Southern West Virginia. I can't speak for the whole of Appalachia because I haven't watched the weather channel in a few days ;)

Normally a lack of evidence that Winter has arrived would make me happy -- ecstatic even --  but this year, not so much. This troubles me. Greatly. It's not normal. Not even close. Not for me any way.

It's 60 degrees outside. Right now. On December 22nd. It's kinda starting to creep me out AND the fact that it's kinda starting to creep me out IS kinda starting to creep me out. Are you with me? Comprende?  Or, as they say here in Appalachia  "Com-pre-HEND-o?"  Actually  they don't say that at all but the hubs has, when he's being especially silly and, thankfully, not often but I digress.

Any way, back to the lack of Winter weather ...

Do you know what happens when the temperature stays above 32 degrees and precipitation falls from the sky in the form of rain? When you're surrounded by hills and dirt and ... in valleys and dirt and ... grass, (extra soggy from all the rain) on top of dirt and ... gravel on top of (what was) dirt, and ... dirt on top of dirt? ...

It turns to mud!
Yes, folks (ding! ding! ding!) we have a winner!
Mud. Mud everywhere. As far as the eye can see.  Yuck. No bueno. I was going to post pictures to prove my point but I decided against it. Why would you want to see that? Well, you wouldn't want to so I stopped myself just short of my obsessive compulsion to show you just how ugly mud can be. Plus, I would've had to go out in the mud to take pics of the mud and ain't nobody got time for that.
Listen, I'm not a fan of the cold. Bone-chilling temps, icy roads and precipitation in the form of freezing rain are things we all could do without.  All I'm really asking for is a happy medium. Surely there is one. 
Listen, I NEVER thought I'd hear myself say this but all this brown on the ground is bringing me down ... I'm beginning to think a white Christmas wouldn't be such a bad thing. At least the white stuff would cover up the brown stuff, right?
After all, it would make the kiddos happy, my neighbor Sara would be thrilled and, oh heck, who am I kidding? I know lots of folks that would be over the moon if we had some snow on Christmas Eve & Christmas Day ... 
Now, before you go and get all weirded out by what I just said 'cause you know me and you're convinced that Kimberly has really lost her mind 'cause this is completely out of character (and you would be right) just know that I'm not advocating snow drifts up to my behind for weeks on end ... far from it!
You can't blame a gal 'cause she'd like to wash the back door rugs and have them look clean for more than a second or because she longs to walk to her car without throwing her back out 'cause she nearly falls on her behind, slipping on wet, brown ground. I declare it's trickier to navigate on foot than the white stuff!
On the other hand, maybe there is something wrong with me. I started to notice it with the first snow fall in early November. During my 17-mile trek to work, I actually looked at the snow covered mountain and thought it was pretty & voiced it. While walking into WalMart one warm evening after work, I had a thought "It's so warm, it just doesn't feel like Christmas" ... what's up with that? I'm just not feeling like myself these days.
For the record, whenever I don't feel like myself, I usually always blame my hormones (or lack thereof) but this time, I'm blaming it on the mud ....
I'm ready for some (barely) below freezing temps to solidify the ground and if that brings on a (reasonable amount of) snow then so be it.
Please excuse me while I look for the thermometer. I think I may be running a temp.